24-year-old woman walks out of family dinner after her 26-year-old sister berates her for ordering an entrée and a dessert: 'She called me a spoiled brat for wasting food and our father’s money'

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Feb 12, 2025 8:00 PM EST

As you age, your exposure to random cruelty often decreases. The number of people who are the victims of browbeating in high school vs. college has to take a monumental downward turn, and it's easy to see why. When you're a kid, you have very little control over who you spend your 7-3 alongside. Teachers and parents can do some things to prevent kids from harassing each other, but the kids themselves are the ones who decide whether to be a little stinker or not. In college and adulthood, you can choose who you spend your time with. If you join the rowing club at your University and on the first day, a guy starts calling you a "little fat boy," you can walk out and never return without any consequences. Being an adult is about following Tyler The Creator's rules of avoiding Cyberbullying. Most people mellow as they age and don't see the point of being a hater. 

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  • While many cruel kids grow up to be kind, productive members of society, the same can't be said for the older sister in this story. She berated her younger sister for ordering an entrée and a dessert at a family dinner, forcing her sister to leave the table in disgust. 

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    STTE
    via Pablo Merchán Montes

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    AITA for walking out of a restaurant after my sister kept making cruel remarks and trying to speak on my behalf?

    My sister (24F) and I (26F) never really had the best relationship growing up. I've always tried to keep it civil, but she wouldn't and has always been r de to me and would try and speak on my behalf as if she's my lawyer. To make things relevant, I'm on the spectrum. She will constantly. convince me to say no whenever others ask me a question, tell me to "shut up" whenever I talk to
    via u/Defiant-Drawing8997
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    my friends or anyone that wanted to have a conversation with me, or my sister will shake her head no either because she disapproves of something or she simply wants me to shut the f up.
    via u/Defiant-Drawing8997
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    Cheezburger Image 10467441920
    via Christopher Ott

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    This past weekend, my parents asked me and my sister to meet with them at a restaurant for dinner as we didn't see each other in weeks and my parents both wanted to treat us. We met them in the restaurant and everything went well until it was time to order. I'm not much of an eater so I wanted to order some of the appetizers, but my parents encouraged me to buy an entree
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    so I can have some food to take home if I don't finish. I thought about getting it but I saw my sister just shaking her head. I asked her what her issue was and she said that she knows I don't need the entree and therefore, I shouldn't waste money or food. My parents told her that isn't her concern and I can order for myself. I ordered the entree | liked and when our food came,
    via u/Defiant-Drawing8997
  • 07
    my sister was glaring at me the entire time. I finished my food and I guess I didn't really need to take leftovers home since they were all gone lol. When asked if we wanted dessert, my dad asked me if I would like some. I said I was full but my dad said he'd want me to at least take something home so I ordered a cheesecake. That was when my sister snapped. She called me a
    via u/Defiant-Drawing8997
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    spoiled brat for wasting food and our father's money and why do I need dessert? My dad told my sister to calm down and said she can get dessert, too. My sister got even more angry and called me names such as a fat pig (I'm around 115 so not even close), a yes-woman whatever the f that means, and how I'm wasting money. I make my own money so idk what her issue was.
    via u/Defiant-Drawing8997
  • 09
    I didn't want to be around her so I just got up and left. My parents begged me to stay as we planned to get coffee somewhere else after but I declined. I couldn't stay if my sister was gonna continue to be there. I even changed my mind on dessert.
    via u/Defiant-Drawing8997
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    When I got home, I've gotten a couple of calls from my parents apologizing on my sisters behalf and my mom said I shouldn't have walked out and let my sister get the better of me. She tends to defend my sister a lot so I told her she needed to wake up and understand how my sister has always tried to control me for reasons I can't understand.
    via u/Defiant-Drawing8997
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    Cheezburger Image 10467450880
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

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    saintandvillian NTA. Stop attending events if your sister is invited. She's evil and you don't deserve a devil ruining your day. The next time your parents invite you two to dinner tell them that you'd love to have a meal with the 2 of them but you are taking a break from your sister. Tell them she has unknown mental health issues that make her obsessed with you and you need a break from it. Tell them that you hope the break gives her time to get a life and quit worrying about yours.
    via u/saintandvillian
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    PrincessXReign Explain that you need a break from your sister bc u are not obligated to subject yourself to her negativity.
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    BooglesthePurps • 9h ago Exactly! Also tell your mum that she didn't get the better of you. You didn't blow up on her or give in to her like she wanted. You removed yourself from a situation you didn't want to be in. Nice and calm and in control. Sk on that lil sis!
    via u/BooglesthePurps
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    BoredofBin NTA! You were sensible enough to walk out before things got way out of hand. The good thing here is that you know how to handle your sister. Next time she does that, just make a sarcastic comment and move on. Or better yet, give her a taste of her own medicine.
    via u/BoredofBin
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    Next time also give your mom, the taste of her medicine by telling her to stand up to every insult that comes out of your dad's/sister's mouth towards her, and see how she handles it.
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    Vegetable-Star-5833 Doesn't sound like he did, sister kept running her mouth and dad never told her to STFU
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    No-Emergency 1901 He did the tell her to calm down.
    via u/No-Emergency1901
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    Vegetable-Star-5833 Telling someone to calm down isn't the same thing as shutting them down, he didn't even try
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    itsthedurf If my children, who are actual children at 10 and 4 right now, were speaking like this to each other, I'd probably ask what was going on, and try to find out what the problem was. If they grow into adults and one is speaking like that to the other? I'm going to ask what the actual f problem is. their
    via u/itsthedurf
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    I expect bad behavior from a kid occasionally, and will parent it. If they're grown adults? I'm leaving their r de a at the restaurant. I don't want to be around it, don't want to hear it, and while they might be too old for me to actually parent them, I'm one of the few people in this world that can legitimately call them on their sh. OP's parents should have stepped up long ago.
    via u/itsthedurf
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    Frellie53 Yes. This is a situation where you say "sister, hold on. What is going on here? We can afford to buy OP food to take home. What are you so worked up about?" Information is missing here, because the sisters comments are so out of left field.
    via u/Frellie53
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    mbrsst No, you're not the a_h_le. And the fact that your parents let your sister have this level of immaturity is appalling. Maybe have a tete a tete with your sister. You're in your mid 20s. This is adolescent behavior at best. Good luck.
    via u/mbrsst
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    Too Much_Today A tete a tete will do no good with someone with this level of sibling rivalry. You are assuming the sister is reasonable, but she is not. Hard consequences are called for.
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    mbrsst Ya, but how do you achieve that without making the parents choose sides? That's the conundrum. They already seem to baby them.
    via u/mbrsst
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    EmceeSuzy I am so sorry. You are NTA and your family seems incredibly disregulated. When/If you feel up to it, call your mother and explain that you will not participate in any more family dinners. Let her know that you would love to dine with her and your dad but if she wants to talk with you about your sister you will not be joining.
    via u/EmceeSuzy
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    SmartassMouth89 NTA she is way too old to be jealous of her sister. You're both adults now and it's high time she started acting like an adult. It's not her job to say what your parents spend their money on. This behavior needs to stop. Your parents need to understand that this kind behavior is not normal and them sweeping it under the rug will not help. A grown woman throwing a tantrum over her parents offering to buy a dessert to take home? It's not her money it's not her choice. The only one
    via u/SmartassMouth89

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Tags

family drama mother sibling rivalry entree sisters siblings dad dinner dessert family food sibling sister family dinner little sister mom Father
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